Sexual Support

I feel quite fortunate to be able to move through so many wonderful sexual alternative communities. I am not personally bi, but my wife Kris is (she has even marched in the Long Beach Gay Pride Parade), and we occasionally host bi parties and we do attend various bi events. We have a long association with various nudist groups (some sexual and most not- well unless you look beneath the surface.) We have long been very active in the swinger community and host a number of parties. We have been to polyamory events, BDSM dungeon parties, parties with porn stars, foot fetish events, and to sex clubs and resorts.

While all of this contributes to our knowledge of human sexuality and makes us better sex educators, we also do it because of the people. They tend to be interesting and fun to be around, even beyond just the sex part (and we really do like the sex part.) To get to the point where you can successfully and comfortably navigate through the various sexual alternative communities requires you to develop strong social skills and to have worked through some of your own issues. You have to have thought about your own sexuality and what it is that you actually desire. These environments encourage and sort of require a certain amount of self-actualization.

Being a part of alternative sexuality groups is also a positive in that you discover that there are others like you. If you worry that you might be too kinky, you will quickly discover people much kinkier than you. You will also learn a lot from others who share similar sexual interests, and you might even discover sexual interests you did not even know you had.
There are many groups that have social events where you can just meet and mingle. These often take place in public venues. We are given so many negative messages about sexuality, I think it is very important to be in environments that are positively affirming and where you can just be yourself.

If you live far from a city you may be out of luck, but even most modest size cities have groups that support various interests. Let Google be your guide.

Swinging and Diversity

My wife and I were at a swing party the other night, but we did not play. That happens sometimes. In this case, it was a smaller party, and we spent most of the time talking to really interesting people that we had not gotten a chance to talk much with in the past.

It got me to thinking about swing parties and the type of people who attend them. The great thing about it is that you develop a very diverse social circle with people from all different backgrounds.

Here in Los Angeles we have one of the most diverse populations in the country, with people from all over the world. There is the opportunity to get to know people with wildly different backgrounds and life experiences.

For someone like me who loves diversity and associating with people who are different from me, L.A. is the perfect place to be. I have had the opportunity to be intimate with women from Japan, China, Russia, India, Iran, the Czech Republic, Mexico, even Canada (some of the most polite sex you will ever have.) I have learned more about their cultures and in many cases spent time with their families and experienced their traditions and the food they grew up with. I have had sex with women of every ethnicity, including Native American. I have been greatly enriched by this intimate exposure to people who are not just like me. I think if we had more of that, there would be less racism and hate, something that now seems to be consuming our country.

L.A. is also a creative town. Among the people who often attend this fairly frequent swing party is a composer with his own orchestra, a successful playwright with productions all over the world, a number of actors, a movie director (mainstream- not porn), a television editor, an actual rocket scientist, and many other people with really interesting careers. These are people I would never have associated with otherwise. Through swinging I have gotten to know an Emmy winning producer, radio and television personalities, writers, sex experts, and so many others. We have friends in the industry from our years working in mainstream show business, but swinging has introduced us to many new people in the industry. Here in L.A. at least, swinging attracts some of the most fascinating people. That is one of the many many reasons I love L.A. and the people who live here.

Behind the Scenes at AEE – Who Are You?

You shoot a lot of pictures of people at the Adult Entertainment Expo, and you have to keep track of them all and who everyone is. Sometimes getting to the person to get the proper spelling of their name (even when you think you know it) can be difficult because of the crowds around them. If you can spot a sign with their name on it or a photo with their name on the table, you can grab a quick shot of that, but by far the easiest is to just get a photo of their name tag. These are photos for reference and never get used. This year, though, I noticed three that were kind of sexy. They were of Hazel Marie, Jessica Fappit, and Kira Noir. You can’t see their faces in the shots below, but you will know who they are. They were all quite beautiful, bu there you get just a tiny glimpse.

Behind the Scenes at AEE 2018 Part 1

I have to admit that I have a fondness for women’s behinds. I also like shooting photos of women’s behinds. This is not something that is normally easily accommodated. Run around doing this at a mall and you will get kicked out or arrested. At the show, though, we journalists have permission to use our cameras. I try not to shoot civilians, though.  These photos are shot very quickly, as the time between target acquisition and target loss is very short. These are rather ephemeral views of the show- scenes that lasted for just the briefest of moments. Shooting from behind, while not including faces or expressions, does avoid the one thing that constantly happens when shooting an adult event- the immediate adoption of sexy girl poses by the models the moment that they see me with a camera. I am looking for something more natural.


A Warm and Kinky December

It is December in Southern California. The other night I was sitting in a Jacuzzi at with an actress, and a fetish model. Both were gorgeous and like me, quite naked. It was a surprisingly warm and pleasant evening where you could run around naked outside and still be reasonably comfortable. I could not help but take a moment to appreciate life.

This was a BDSM party with a number of people in the industry- fetish models, performers, and professional doms. Our party host is very well liked in the community, and his parties attract a large number of lifestyle practitioners.

The pool was heated, and there was a tall suspension system over the pool that people could hang from. One extremely athletic woman in a very short skirt and no underwear climbed up the rope, and my wife and I were in the water directly below with what turned out to be the best seat in the house. There are worse places to be on a Saturday night.

The submissive of our party host is actually quite a talented artist. She had a bunch of new erotic art framed up on the walls along with the many other very nice works of erotic art throughout the house. Our host is friends with a number of well known artists and has some very unique pieces.

Of course there was an impressive dungeon. Underneath a king sized bed was a cage, which was actually a great place to people watch. There was a coffin you could have sex in. There was a very good selection of whipping and spanking implements available for use. There were spanking benches, and and other BDSM furniture.

Beyond having a well equipped dungeon, our host also has many well-equipped friends. This really was an exceptionally attractive crowd. Whether hanging in the pool naked with them or watching various scenes, there was much to stimulate the senses. There were even a few people attending from different parts of the country. It was a great opportunity to learn about the scene where they were from, and of course, the conversations often lead to learning about a lot of different things people are into and what their desires are.

I personally am not a big time dom. I have some skills, but many of the people here were masters in both senses of the term. There was much to be learned from them, and Kris and I are constantly learning and making the hard sacrifice of going out to all these different sex related events to make ourselves better teachers.  You’re welcome.




My wife and I are Halloween obsessed, and we make it into a big deal at CenterSEE and hold a big annual Halloween sex party. We recently attended the annual Son of Monsterpalooza convention looking for ideas. You can read more more about it on Sex in Review in the Monsterous Sex article.

One of our theme rooms is the Tacky Tiki Terror room. Think Tiki bar in hell. I was looking for art that was sexy, Tiki themed, and horror themed. An impossible mission, you might think. I found three decorative items for the room- two pieces of art and an erotic Tiki themed horror comic.

Another themed room is Annabelle’s Room, inspired by the original Annabelle film and the just released sequel. It just so happened that they had the doll from the movie, and I snapped a picture of it. I turned it into what looks like a painting, and it will hang in Annabelle’s room.

There were some pictures that were interesting but not all that sexy, so I thought I would include them here.

One of the most amazing costumes was a perfect Chewbacca. He roared and was carrying the ripped off head of C3PO. He could make the head talk and make various sounds just by pressing different fingers together.


Another outfit made by a 17 year old was also impressive-


This life sized statue had a bleeding heart fountain inside and cool lighting.


Ronald McDonald’s severed head seems to be inappropriately staring at that woman.


Speaking of head, I can’t imagine anyone would want head from this guy-

I can’t wait for Halloween. At the same time, I am so glad it is still a month away as we are only half way done with the decorating.

Behind the Scenes of the Golden Age of Cinema Show

While I try and keep up with what is going on, I was completely unaware of the The Golden Age of Adult Cinema show. It is a series of three different shows over the course of three weekends, and we do a review of the first night on Sex in Review.

A good friend who is a bit of a mainstream celebrity clued me in, as he was friends with the producer, although this is not the type of show he normally goes to. Like me, my friend has a background in magic, and we were both acting around the same time, so we have a lot in common. While I left acting, he went on to have a really amazing career.

We all went together, but whenever we go anywhere with him, he is recognized and graciously poses for pictures. He is often approached by very sexy women, and he is a bit of a flirt. He is also very gregarious, so it seems like wherever we go with him, tons of people know him.

This event was the first time we have gone anywhere where I felt like I knew more people, and wound up talking to more beautiful women than he did. I was wearing my journalist hat (not literally, as the hats are really dorky looking, although I did see a journalist at the AEE who was wearing the classic 1930s look ironically and really pulled it off). Being a journalist lets you talk to everyone, and while my friend got stuck in a corner for much of the time after the show talking to a young actress seeking career advice, Kris and I hit the after-party and flirted with porn stars. We also got a chance to talk with a number of very interesting people.

I was happy to run into a number of people that I knew. For me, it was nice having been away from writing about the adult industry scene for many years to not be completely forgotten. There were even a couple of women there whose radio shows I was on years ago.

We met one woman who was there to help a friend. She told us a very amusing and outrageous story about her days running a dungeon in New York in the 90s. I wish I had permission to repeat it.

We met another woman also just there to help a friend (really) who Kris thought looked familiar, and it turned out that she was a fellow magician (while I am officially retired from performing, Kris is doing magic again after taking a break for several years). We had seen her at a magician’s only lecture at the Magic Castle. It is a small world.

The BTS blog is a place where I get to add things that got left out of the review or article on Sex in Review. In this case, I completely forgot to mention Rhonda Jo Petty, who had a table with a number of interesting items for sale. Her first release was Disco Lady in 1978, but she is probably best remembered as a bustier Farrah Fawcett look-alike, and there was an arguable similarity. She is in the AVN Hall of Fame and the XRCO (X-Rated Critics Association) Hall of Fame. I took a shot of her in a great pose, and was most disappointed to discover that it was out of focus.

If you are in L.A. and like the stars and films from the Golden Age of Adult Cinema, check out our review and try and see the show.

Getting Ready for Halloween

I worked as a professional magician and comedian in my younger days, and then spent a number of years working in the entertainment industry, as did my wife Kris. We still have lots of friends in entertainment, and one of the areas that merged between magic and show business was knowing a number of people who do special effects and makeup for movies and television. That also ties in with our love of Halloween.

You’ll read about just how extensively we love Halloween and the major sex themed Halloween party we throw every year on the Sex in Review site towards the end of September when we do our Halloween Preview. We’ll have full coverage of last year’s party with tons of ideas you can do your self (and a free nude female ghost video you can download with instructions on how to use it). We’ll also have articles on sexy costumes, and Halloween appropriate sex toys.

Looking for ideas for Halloween, we attended the Son of Monsterpalooza convention over the weekend. This is a show for fans of monsters and horror. There were not nearly as many sexy costumes as there were at Wondercon, but a topless woman did come in second for the costume contest.


She looks naked in the pic but she is clothed behind the giant check, and she is wearing pasties. The winner was quite amazing as well as horrifying though. Conjoined elderly twins, although underneath all the latex it was just a couple of kids.


Afterwards it was off to a private party. One of the things I love about L.A. is its diversity and all the amazingly interesting people you encounter. It is certainly one of the best places to meet people from the world of entertainment. At this party there were actors, directors, make-up people and creature designers. I moved around from cluster to cluster trying to catch as much conversation as I could and wishing I could be everywhere at once.

Don Post Jr. was there. He is an extremely pleasant gentleman, especially considering all the horror he has brought us. His father was known as the Godfather of Halloween, having founded a company in 1938 that produced the best Halloween masks for decades. Don Post Jr. followed in his father’s footsteps. Did you know that the mask that the Michael Myers character wore in the original Halloween film was a modified Don Post mask of William Shatner?

Also in attendance was Ron Chaney. His grandfather Lon Chaney, and father, Lon Chaney Jr., were pretty famous in the horror business. We have run into Ron a couple of other times in the past year. He is also extremely pleasant and full of interesting stories. In fact, monster people in general are some of the nicest people you will encounter. We first ran into him when we wound up sitting next to him at a screening of a restored presentation of Phantom of the Opera.

The story behind Phantom of the Opera is very interesting. Shot in 1924, the test showing was not favorably reviewed. It was then reshot with a different director to be more comedic. The test audience booed it off the screen. It was up to famed director and editor Lois Weber to cut together the various footage into what has become a classic.

You can learn more about Lois Weber by visiting the Erotic University virtual campus and going to the RTV department. That is where the Lois Weber Theater is located, and you can read about the woman who is considered one of the most important directors of the silent era, and certainly the most versatile as a hugely successful actor, writer, director, and producer. You can also watch a screening of one of her films in which she both starred and directed, where she appears nude throughout. It was pretty racy for 1915.